The Sick and the Restless
I’m home sick. It’s not swine flu. Don’t worry. It’s more like piglet head cold.
7:00 AM
Wake up on the couch covered in cats. My nose is stopped up. I said “Hello?” out loud just to test my voice. Yup. I still sound like Peter Brady coming of age.
7:02 AM
Fall back asleep.
7:16 AM
Wrote my WFH email to my coworkers.
7:17 AM
Decided to start a marathon of Making the Band. First bad TV decision of the day. Fell back asleep with the Making the Band volume too high.
9:30 AM
Woke up and realized I was dreaming about yachts and yell-fighting and being in “Miami, trick.” Thanks, Diddy. Checked emails and passed out again.
10:00 AM
Woke up to loud banging on my door. Answered the door looking like the trash heap from Fraggle Rock. Some guy came in and checked my smoke alarms. Loud door knocking and high-pitched test beeps = perfect. Clear!
11:30 AM
Decided to drop in on the boardrooms and bedrooms of Genoa City. Catching up on the Young and the Restless. Um… since when does Kevin Fisher get visited by an imaginary chipmunk friend? And why is the chipmunk so EVILLLLLLLLLLL???
12:30 PM
Soup.
1:20 PM
My chipmunks are getting evil. Timmy looks like a python halfway through eating a mouse whole. Poor Yoda. Plus why is he holding the remote? Must grab that.
1:47 PM
The imaginary chipmunk is in the apartment with me now. He’s making me tea. Furries are cool.
